Most people have never arranged a funeral before and the responsibility can be quite daunting and not a particularly good time. Here is our advice and guide to help you find the right funeral provider for your family.
Did you know that there is no legal requirement to have a funeral at all? UK law only requires that the death is registered, and the deceased is either cremated in a licensed facility or buried in a suitable plot.
Many British funeral traditions are from the Victorian era, which set out very strict rules regarding how a person should be mourned. But times have now changed and now we are finally creating our own mourning traditions, traditions that reflect what makes our family and friends unique. You only get one chance to do this so take your time, and think about the following questions before you make decisions about the farewell and funeral itself:
What Is The Purpose Of The Event?
So, any of the following may apply: You are saying goodbye, celebrating the life, commending into God’s care, giving thanks to them, spiritual support, meeting community expectations, expressing love, releasing the soul, gathering together, reflecting on our own mortality, putting on a good show and many more reasons.
Who Will Be At The Funeral?
Allowing enough time to gather all the important family members and friends will result in a more satisfying and supportive event. But in today’s hectic world this can and does often take weeks, especially if you are negotiating with an unhelpful ex-partner or a dysfunctional family.
One good solution is to separate the committal from the main farewell event. A private or unattended cremation takes care of the practical aspects with dignity and respect. It can be less stressful, minimise absentees and allows time to craft the perfect goodbye.
Choosing The Right Event For The Funeral
Most funerals take place at the local crematorium – familiar to many, ample parking, lovely grounds and the coffin can be present during the service. But remember – there are no happy memories there, the time is very limited, yours will be one of several funerals on that day and most people would avoid bringing children to this place. Why not try taking a memorial photo of your loved one or the Ashes urn as a focal point, then hold your own style of farewell somewhere you feel relaxed, able to make as much noise as you like.
What Parts Of The Funeral Are More Important
This is very personal and different for everybody. There are many ways to reflect the things that made this person special (without spending more than you should).
For some the coffin itself is a final expression of care and must reflect how special this person was, others take an entirely pragmatic approach. The number of vehicles in the cortege indicates the deceased’s importance and community standing – the quantity and scale of the floral tributes achieves the same thing.
A traditional funeral Mass or Thanksgiving service may be the central event for some, with the wake described as the “best” bit by most of us, but others focus on the scattering or interment of the ashes as the point of closure.
A shared ritual can be moving and comforting – you can employ a professional celebrant (religious, humanist or civil) or devise a service that is truly personal and original.
Who Are The Best Funeral Directors?
Now that you have a better idea about the kind of farewell that’s right for your family you are equipped to choose the right service provider. This could be a traditional local undertaker to arrange a full service, a direct cremation specialist who will look after the essentials, or something in-between.
Funeral Directors South Wales
A good funeral professional will always want to help you achieve the perfect send-off, but you need to tell them what that looks like! As the farewell ceremony is the most important part of the proceedings, you might want to begin by choosing a celebrant. They work alongside the local funeral directors and will be able to recommend someone who can give you what you want and need.